Volume 2 ... Number 30
BLEACH SPILLS AGAIN
By Edwy ap Edwin, Staff Writer
Thomas residents discovered
yet another bleach spill
Tuesday, Although not as severe as the last bleach
spill
reported by the Times, this spill is more awkward
since no
one has yet cleaned it up, as this article goes to press.
A large puddle of bleach blocks
the doorway from the
stairs into the milkroom. "If this keeps up, there will
be
a white carpet in the dining room," said one Thomas
resi-
dent, her face pale.
There has been no official inquiry
into this environ-
mental hazard to date. However, the paper
was asked to
print the following public service message:
Please
be very careful when handling ammonia
in the milk room until the bleach is cleaned
up!!
The TMS Inquirer
... inquiring minds want to know ...
Alex Jarrett was called to clearness today
by Megan for
sitting on a table. The clearness was brief
and to the
point, although Alex seemed to be in shock from the
whole
process. His vocabulary apparently consisted
only of the
two words "I guess", repeated at frequent intervals.
Raychael accused Ada
of having an intense physical
relationship with broccoli. When informed of this
allega-
tion, someone claimed that inter-species intense
physical
relationships were within the sex minutes as they stand.
Ada seems to be doing a lot
these days! Yesterday,
Alex Jarrett accused her of killing first Niels'
father,
then his own.
The comics are made possible by a grant from Jon McGee
The corporate sponsor wishes you to know that
he did not
dedicate these comics.
SELECTED BY JON (Dedicated to Jon McGee)